This $250 Touch-Free Dispenser Warms Up Your Lube

You know the move. You’re about to get busy, find yourself in need of a bit of assistance, do an awkward mating dance as you reach around your partner for the lube bottle, then noisily squeeze out cold goo. The creators of the Pulse understand that this is a problem. And for $250, they can lend a helping hand.

Like an overpriced soap dispenser, the Pulse fits neatly on top of your nightstand for easy access. Simply plug into an outlet, wave your hand under it, and a dollop of warm lube squirts out automatically. Look Ma, no hands!                                                                                                                                 Unfortunately, similar to the procession of Keurig-like devices before it, the Pulse requires its own brand of lube pods to work. And like it’s hefty price tag, the Pulse Pods will cost you a pretty penny. Each pod will give you 9 lube “servings” and each refill package contains 6 pods for $25.

If you’re looking for ways to justify this purchase, the company claims that their silicone-based lubes are paraben-free, hypoallergenic, and made with aloe and vitamin E. Also, it comes with nifty mood lighting. So, there’s that.

Our only question is, how many pods will it take to lube up this?